Erich Fromm Quotes

On why isolation feels unbearable:

Love is the only sane and satisfactory answer to the problem of human existence.

On telling dependency from real love:

Immature love says, I love you because I need you. Mature love says, I need you because I love you.

On losing yourself in a relationship:

The paradox of love is that two beings become one and yet remain two.

On staying when feelings fade:

Love is an act of will, namely, it involves both a decision and a commitment.

On slowing down instead of rushing a decision:

Modern man thinks he loses something, time, when he does not do things quickly.

Understanding why loneliness is pushing you toward a relationship decision:

The desire for interpersonal fusion is the most powerful striving in man.

Weighing whether the problem is the partner or your own capacity to love:

Love is not primarily a relationship to a specific person; it is an attitude, an orientation of character.

Deciding how much of yourself to keep while committing to someone:

Mature love is union under the condition of preserving one's integrity, one's individuality.

Facing the discomfort of having to define your own purpose:

Man is the only animal for whom his own existence is a problem which he has to solve.

Deciding whether self-respect and loving others can grow together:

The affirmation of one's own life, happiness, growth, freedom is rooted in one's capacity to love, i.e., in care, respect, responsibility, and knowledge.

On becoming who you are meant to be:

Man's main task in life is to give birth to himself, to become what he potentially is.

On whether self-care is selfish:

Selfishness is not identical with self-love but with its very opposite.

Deciding what would make a career feel meaningful rather than just secure:

There is no purpose in life except the one man gives to his life by the unfolding of his powers.

Deciding whether a choice is really yours or just what is expected:

He adopts entirely the kind of personality offered to him by cultural patterns and thus becomes exactly as all others are.